Te Whakararuraru Ā-hinengaro: He aha te mea, ā, he aha ngā tohu?

Ina whakaaro te tangata ki te tinihanga, he maha ngā wā ka whakaarohia e rātou te tinihanga tinana. Heoi, ka taea hoki te pakaru o ngā whanaungatanga i roto i ngā huarahi huna ake, kāore i te wā katoa e uru ana te pā tinana. Ko tētahi o ngā momo tinihanga e warewarehia ana ko te whanaungatanga kare ā-roto, ka taea te whanake haere, ā, i ētahi wā kāore tetahi o te tokorua e tino mōhio ki te mea e tupu ana.

Ko te hononga ā-roto e pā ana ki tētahi hononga tata, piripono ki tētahi atu i waho o tētahi hononga pumau e uru ana ki te whakawhirinaki ā-roto, te huna, te taumahatanga aroha rānei. Kei roto pea i tēnei ko te whakapuaki i ngā whakaaro whaiaro kāore i kōrerotia ki tētahi hoa, te rapu whakamarie ā-roto mai i tētahi atu, te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero tūmataiti pinepine, te whakawhanake rānei i tētahi wairua piripono kaha e tīmata ana ki te whakakapi i te whanaungatanga ā-roto i roto i te hononga tuatahi.

He rerekē ki ngā whakahoahoa noa, he maha ngā wā ka uru atu ki ngā hononga kare ā-roto he taumata hohonu ake o te haumi kare ā-roto ka taea te whakakore i ngā rohe. I te nuinga o te wā, kāore pea te hunga e whai wāhi ana ki te kite i ā rātou whanonga he mea hē i te tīmatanga, ā, ka uaua ake te tautuhi me te whakatika. Heoi, i roto i te wā, ka taea e ēnei hononga te hanga i te tawhiti i waenga i ngā hoa, ā, ka arahi ki ngā kare ā-roto o te tinihanga, te hae, te kore whakawhirinaki rānei.

He mea nui te mārama ki ngā hononga kare ā-roto hei pupuri i ngā whanaungatanga hauora. I roto i tēnei tuhinga, ka tūhuratia e tātou te tikanga tuturu o te hononga kare ā-roto, te take e puta ai, me ngā tohu whakatūpato matua hei tirotiro. Ka matapakihia hoki e tātou me pēhea te mōhio ki ngā rohe kare ā-roto i mua i te takahi i aua rohe, me pēhea hoki te urupare a ngā tāne me ngā wāhine i roto i te huarahi whai hua, hauora hoki.

He aha te Tinihanga Ā-hinengaro?

Ko te tinihanga kare ā-roto e whakamāramahia ana ko tētahi whanaungatanga tata, piripono ki tētahi atu tangata ehara i tō hoa rangatira, tae atu ki te whanaungatanga kare ā-roto, ā-ira tangata rānei. Ka taea tēnei te hanga i tētahi mea mai i te whakapuaki i ngā mea ngaro me te whakapuaki i ō whakaaro tetahi ki tetahi ki te takaro, tae noa ki te moe tāne.

Ahakoa e whakaarohia ana ngā hononga ā-roto he kino ake i ngā hononga ā-tinana, he rite tonu te kino ki te whanaungatanga. Nā te mea he tinihanga i te whakawhirinaki, ā, he uaua ake te whakamutu. Ki te āwangawanga koe kei te whai hononga ā-roto koe, pānuihia kia mōhio ai koe ki te aha, ngā tohu hei tirotiro, me ngā mea ka taea e koe te mahi mōna.

Te Whakawhanaungatanga Ā-hinengaro VS Te Whakahoahoa Platonic

He mea noa te whai hoa piripono o te ira tangata kē. He mea pai pea tēnei mō tō whanaungatanga. Ko te mea kāore e pai ana ko te tīmatanga o tō whanaungatanga ki te whiti i te rohe ki tētahi mea nui atu.

He iti noa ngā rerekētanga matua i waenga i te whanaungatanga platonic me te whanaungatanga kare ā-roto:

• Mēnā he hononga aroha tōu, ka huna e koe ō mea ngaro i tō hoa. Kei roto pea i tēnei ko te kōrero mō ngā mea kāore koe e pai ki te kōrero ki a rātou, te huna rānei i ō kōrero me ō taunekeneke mai i a rātou.
• He maha ngā wā ka nui ake te kaha o te hononga aroha i te whanaungatanga. Tērā pea ka kitea koe e whakaaro tonu ana ki te tangata kē, ā, ka harikoa, ka harikoa rānei koe ina tata koe ki a ia.
• Ko ngā hononga kare ā-roto he tikanga he āwangawanga ā-ira tangata. Ahakoa kāore koe e mahi i tēnā, he maha tonu ngā wā ka nui te hiahia i waenganui i te tokorua e whai wāhi ana.
• Ka taea e te hononga ā-roto te whakakino i tō whanaungatanga matua. Ki te nui ake tō wā me tō kaha e pau ana ki tētahi atu, ka tino pāngia tō whanaungatanga ki tō hoa.

Te Whakahāwea i te Wairua VS Te Tinihanga Iti

Ko te tinihanga iti he kupu e whakamahia ana hei whakaahua i ngā mahi tinihanga iti, ahakoa kāore e kiia he tinihanga, engari ka mamae tonu ki tō hoa.

Ko ētahi tauira o te tinihanga iti ko:

• Te takaro ki tētahi atu.
• Te whakawhitiwhiti karere kuputuhi, īmēra rānei mō ngā āhuatanga piripono, ā-ira tangata rānei ki tētahi atu.
• Te pai, te tuku kōrero rānei ki ngā pou pāpāho pāpori a tētahi atu.
• Te huna i tō mana whanaungatanga i runga i ngā pāpāho pāpori.
• Te tuku karere tika ki runga i ngā pāpāho pāpori ki tētahi e hiahia ana koe.
• Te kōrero mō ō raruraru whanaungatanga ki tētahi atu tangata ehara i tō hoa rangatira.

Ahakoa ehara te tinihanga iti i te tohu kei te whai hononga kare ā-roto koe, he tohu pea tēnei kāore koe i te makona ki tō whanaungatanga o nāianei. Ki te mea kei te āwangawanga koe kei te tinihanga koe, kei tō hoa rānei, he mea nui kia kōrero mārama, kia pono hoki mō ō āwangawanga.

He aha ngā tohu o te hononga ā-hinengaro?

He uaua ki te kite i ngā tohu o te whanaungatanga kare ā-roto, ina koa kāore koe i te tino mōhio ki tāu e rapu ana. Heoi, kei reira ētahi tohu noa hei tirotiro māu, tae atu ki:

• He nui ake te wā e pau ana ki te kōrero, ki te tuku karere rānei ki tētahi atu i tōu wā e pau ana ki tō hoa.
• Te huna i tō mana whanaungatanga i runga i ngā pāpāho pāpori.
• Te tuku karere tika ki runga i ngā pāpāho pāpori ki tētahi e hiahia ana koe.
• Te kōrero mō ō raruraru whanaungatanga ki tētahi atu tangata ehara i tō hoa rangatira.
• Te takaro ki tētahi atu tangata ehara i tō hoa.
• He nui ake te hononga kare ā-roto ki tētahi atu tangata ehara i tō hoa rangatira.
• Whakaritea he mahere me tētahi atu tangata ehara i tō hoa, engari kaua e whakaurua ia.
• Te whakaaro ki tētahi atu tangata ehara i tō hoa rangatira, i te mea me arotahi koe ki tētahi atu mea.

Ki te kite koe i tētahi o ēnei tohu o te kukume kare ā-roto mai i tētahi tāne i roto i tō whanaungatanga, he mea nui kia kōrero koe ki tō hoa mō te aha e tupu ana. Mā te kore aro ki te raruraru ka kino noa iho, ā, ka mutu pea ka arahi ki tētahi moepuku, ki tētahi whakarere rānei.

He aha ngā take e pā ai ngā raruraru hinengaro?

He maha ngā take e pāngia ai te tangata e ngā hononga kare ā-roto. I ētahi wā, he mea noa iho te kukume ki tētahi ehara i tō hoa rangatira. I ētahi wā anō, tera pea he raruraru kei roto i tō whanaungatanga e take ana koe ki te rapu aro me te hononga kare ā-roto i waho o te whanaungatanga.

Ko ētahi o ngā tino take o ngā raruraru kare ā-roto:

• Te korenga o te whanaungatanga piripono, te korenga rānei o te whanaungatanga o nāianei.
• Te whakaaro kāore koe i te arohia, kāore rānei koe i te hiranga i roto i tō whanaungatanga o nāianei.
• Te kukume ki tētahi kāore e taea te whakapā atu (kua mārenatia, me ētahi atu).
• He hiahia kia arohia, kia whakamanahia rānei, engari kāore e tutukihia ana e tō hoa.
• He hiahia mō te whakahihiri, mō te mōrearea rānei, kāore i roto i tō whanaungatanga o nāianei.
• Te hoha, te hoha rānei i roto i tō whanaungatanga o nāianei.

Ko te pouri o te tāne me ngā hononga ā-hinengaro he wheako hononga ā-hinengaro e puta pinepine ana ina kore tetahi o ngā hoa, o ngā hoa rānei e hono tetahi ki tetahi. Ka taea ēnei te noho ā-tinana, ā-hinengaro, ā-kare ā-roto rānei.

Ina tinihanga tō hoa i roto i te ngākau, ka rite ki te maripi ki te maripi i werohia ai te ngākau. Tērā pea ka pōhēhē koe, ka mamae, ka mokemoke hoki. Tērā pea ka pōhēhē koe kei a koe te he mō tā rāua moepuku. Engari ko te pono, ko tō hoa te kawenga mō ā rāua mahi me ā rāua kare ā-roto.

Me pēhea te whakahaere i tētahi raruraru kare ā-roto?

Me aha koe ina tinihanga tō hoa i te taha kare ā-roto? Ki te kitea e koe kei te moe tāne tō hoa, he mea nui kia whai wā koe ki te tukatuka i ō kare ā-roto. He mea noa te mamae, te hae, me te tinihanga. Tērā pea ka whakaaro koe kei a koe te he mō tā rāua moe tāne. Engari ko te pono, ko tō hoa te kawenga mō ā rāua mahi me ā rāua kare ā-roto.

Kia whai wāhi koe ki te tukatuka i ō kare ā-roto, me whakatau koe he aha tāu e hiahia ana ki te mahi mō te āhuatanga. Ki te whakatau koe ki te noho tonu i roto i te whanaungatanga, me mahi koe ki te hanga anō i te whakawhirinaki. Ka hiahiatia he wā, he manawanui, me te kaha. Engari ka taea tēnei mēnā ka whakapau kaha ngā hoa e rua ki te whakahaere i ngā mea kia angitu.

Ki te whakatau koe ki te wehe atu i te whanaungatanga, me tūpato. Kia tino whai mahere pakari koe māu ake. Kāore koe e hiahia ki te whakatau ohorere ka pouri koe i muri mai.

Me pēhea te tiaki i tō mārenatanga mai i te tinihanga kare ā-roto?

Ahakoa ehara i te mea ngāwari te whakahaere i ō kare ā-roto, ka taea tonu te tiaki i tō marena mai i te tinihanga kare ā-roto.

Anei ētahi tohutohu:

• Kōrerohia tonutia ki tō hoa. Mā tēnei ka āwhina i a koe kia mau tonu te hononga, ā, kia kore ai koe e piri ki tētahi atu.
• Whakapaua te wā ki te mahi i ngā mea e pai ana ki a kōrua. Mā tēnei ka ora tonu te hononga.
• Kia pono ki a koutou ngā whakaaro me ngā kare ā-roto o tētahi ki tētahi. Mā tēnei ka ārai i ngā māramatanga kore me ngā kare ā-roto mamae.
• Whakawhirinaki ki tō kare ā-roto. Ki te kore tetahi mea e tika ana, kāore pea. Kaua e warewarehia tō kare ā-roto nā te mea kāore koe e hiahia ki te aro atu ki te pono.

He rite tonu te kino o te haumi kare ā-roto ki tētahi atu tangata ki te tinihanga tinana ki tētahi whanaungatanga. Ki te kore koe e tūpato, ka arahi pea ki te mamae, te mamae, me te tinihanga. Kia tūpato ki ngā tohu o te tinihanga kare ā-roto, ā, me mahi i ngā mahi hei tiaki i tō marena mai i tēnei momo tinihanga.

Ngā Pātai Auau

1. Ka huri ngā kare ā-roto hei aroha?

Ka taea e te hononga ā-hinengaro te huri hei hononga tinana tino pakari. Heoi anō, tera pea ka memeha haere te hononga ā-hinengaro, ā, kāore e neke atu i te hononga ā-hinengaro noa iho. Kei te hunga takitahi me ngā āhuatanga e pā ana ki te hononga ā-hinengaro te whakawhirinaki.

2. Me pēhea te muru i te tinihanga kare ā-roto?

Hei muru i te hara o tō hoa, tīmata mā te kōrero ki a rātou mō te mea i tupu. Kōrerohia te take i pouri ai koe, me te pānga o ā rātou mahi ki a koe. Kia oti te kōrero i ō kare ā-roto, hoatu he wā ki tō hoa ki te whakaaroaro ki tā rātou i hē ai. Kia whai wā rātou ki te whakaaroaro mō ngā mea, kōrerohia te murunga hara.

3. He aha ngā take e pāngia ai ngā tāne e ngā raruraru kare ā-roto?

He maha ngā wā ka haere tahi ngā tāne me ngā hononga kare ā-roto nā te mea he nui ake te tūponotanga o ngā tāne ki te tinihanga i ngā wāhine. I ētahi wā, ka kore pea ngā tāne e harikoa ki tā rātou whanaungatanga o nāianei, ā, ka tahuri ki tētahi atu wahine mō te aro me te whakamana. I ētahi atu wā, ka raru pea ngā tāne i ngā take whaiaro pērā i te iti o te whakaaro ki a ia anō, te pouri rānei, ka ārahi pea i a rātou ki te rapu tautoko kare ā-roto mai i tētahi atu i waho o tā rātou whanaungatanga.

Whakamutunga

Ki te whakapae koe kei te pāngia tō hoa e te whanaungatanga kare ā-roto, he mea nui kia kōrerohia ō āwangawanga me te mārie me te whakaute. Kaua e whakamahi i te kupu whakapae, ā, tukua tō hoa kia whakamārama i ā rāua whanonga. Ki te kore tō hoa e pai ki te whakapuaki me te pono i ō rāua kare ā-roto, kua tae pea te wā ki te whakaaro ki te whakamutu i te whanaungatanga. He uaua, he mamae hoki te whakaora i te whanaungatanga kare ā-roto, engari ka taea te neke atu me te hanga i tētahi whanaungatanga hauora, pumau me tētahi atu.